


Alone

by automaticdoor



Category: Garth Nix - Abhorsen series
Genre: Gen, Yuletide 2007
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-12-25
Updated: 2007-12-25
Packaged: 2017-10-30 08:27:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,058
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/329783
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/automaticdoor/pseuds/automaticdoor
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Lirael is convinced she's alone. Her friends and family are determined to prove her wrong.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Alone

**Author's Note:**

  * For [bluflamingo](https://archiveofourown.org/users/bluflamingo/gifts).



> Sam snuck his way in here, though he wasn't really part of the request. He's too close to Lirael to leave her alone either. :)

 

 

_They were upon her. The Dead, Dead Hands, Dead she had never seen before, couldn't have imagined, everywhere, surrounding her, pressing in._

_She frantically scrabbled at her bandolier, fumbling for Saraneth, for anything at this point to send them back, to get them away, to let her escape. She couldn't breathe, couldn't move, couldn't think._

_Her attempts were in vain. They continued to march, stinking of rotting flesh. Those with discernable mouths were grinning maniacally, thrilling to the scent of life, of pumping blood, of a warm soul. Closer, closer, and everything turned to black..._

Lirael woke up, gasping for air. She sat up, wildly looking around, hands flying to her bandolier out of sheer instinct, but instead of the devastation she had seen, the desolate landscape full of hot air and dead trees and nothing but destruction, there was only peace, only bright sunshine, a warm breeze, blue sky, soft grass, which was rather indented where she had been lying.

She noticed a sting in her good hand, her real hand, and looked down to see tiny drops of blood from the sharp edges of the soapstone dog, which she had apparently been clutching in her sleep. Irritated, she shoved the dog into her pocket and stood up, face clouded, unconsciously flexing the fingers of her new and still strange golden hand. Scanning the horizon, her dark hair blowing in the breeze, she brooded. Alone. Always alone.

***

From one of the upper windows of the castle, Sabriel watched her half-sister with a worried expression on her face. "Ellie?" she called.

Ellimere looked up from her desk, where she was catching up on correspondence long since forgotten in the heat of battle. "Yes, Mother?"

"Have you noticed anything strange about Lirael lately, dear?"

Ellimere rolled her eyes. "Mother, if that is a pointed way of saying, dear, Lirael looks rather traumatized still from everything and maybe you should do something about it, then yes, I have noticed."

Sabriel smiled. "Of course. I am worried about her, though. It's been hard for her... finding new family and a new heritage, losing a clan and a heritage she had thought was hers, not to mention having lost her hand. And, being the Abhorsen is never easy, as she has already learned."

"Well, what should I do?"

"You're a clever girl, I'm sure you'll think of something. Just... be with her?"

"All right."

Ellimere pondered. From her experience with horses, she knew that when one was injured, whether in body or spirit, it reacted angrily to even the most well-intentioned touch. Humans weren't all that different, really. She just had to approach this practically. There were some things she couldn't fix. The burden of an Abhorsen was obviously something she could not help with. But, if Lirael was in mourning over her lost connection with the Clayr... well, maybe there was something she could do there.

She smiled, picking up a piece of parchment.

***

In the Glacier of the Clayr, a letter arrived bearing the royal seal. Sanar and Ryelle read it carefully.

"Sister, what do you think?" Ryelle asked, anxiously batting away a strand of straw-blonde hair.

"I don't know. There have been some who have Seen trouble arising from this. If Lirael cannot make peace with her situation, she will eventually endanger everyone. Lack of concentration, lack of calm... both of these will impact her performance as an Abhorsen." Sanar said. "And... well, if she is not happy, that is also of concern to us as well."

Ryelle placed a hand over her sister's. "I know. Though she is no longer with us, she is still a Clayr, no matter what else she might be. And, we have come to care about her as well."

Sanar began to pace. "What should we do?"

"We shall go to her," Ryelle declared. "We shall go, and we shall talk to her, and we shall attempt to help her realize that she can exist in multiple worlds... life, death, Clayr, Abhorsen... she is a part of all of these, and they are a part of her. She does not have to reject one for the sake of the others."

***

Lirael was in the royal library reading when Sam dashed in, hair ruffled and cheeks flushed from the breeze. "Lirael! There's a Paperwing!"

"Who's here?"

"We are," two voices said in unison. Startled, Lirael looked to the door. Sanar and Ryelle stood there, two bright spots of sunlight against grey stone.

"What... what are you doing here?"

"Surely you didn't think that we were just going to leave you here alone after everything?" Sanar asked with a stern tone, though the twinkle in her sky-blue eyes betrayed her true emotions.

Ryelle said with softer inflections, "Dear, we've Seen things. We're concerned. And..."

"And?"

"Your niece sent us a letter," Sanar stated.

A slightly dangerous glint appeared in Lirael's eyes. "Ellimere sent you a letter?"

"I did," Ellimere said, stepping into the room. "Lirael, we are all worried about you. You don't sleep, you don't eat, you're never here, really. I mean, you're physically here, but mentally leagues away."

"And what is it to any of you?"

At that, everyone in the room stared. Sam was the first to recover his voice. "Lirael, we laid down our lives together to bind Orannis! Every single person in this room cares about you! We have a bond that is stronger than anyone else could know!"

Ellimere, with her usual candor but with an unusual vulnerability, was next. "We have not known each other long, but we are of an age. I had hoped... it is so lonely here. Sam is wonderful, but Mother and Father are gone often, and I am not an Abhorsen, but I have burdens of my own. I had hoped we could share those burdens, that we could support each other."

"Though we are farther apart now, we still have a blood-bond, Lirael. You are still Clayr, whatever else you might be," Ryelle appealed.

"New parts of your existence do not erase the old. We are all here, all connected to you," Sanar said.

"Lirael... though the Dog is gone, you're not alone," Sam said, a hopeful look on his face.

All was silent. Then, Lirael's lips quirked slightly. The tension lifted. She was, apparently, not as alone as she had thought.

 


End file.
